* Golf’s a hard game to figure. One day you’ll go out and slice it and shank it, hit into all the traps and miss every green. The next day you go out and for no reason at all you really stink.
* I play in the low 80’s. If it’s any hotter than that, I won’t play.
* If your best shots are the practice swing and the “gimme putt”, you might want to reconsider this game.
* Achieving a certain level of success in golf is only important if you can finally enjoy the level you’ve reached after you’ve reached it.
* Golf is the only sport where your most feared opponent is you.
* Golf is like marriage: If you take yourself too seriously it won’t work….and both are expensive.
* The best wood in most golfer’s bags is the pencil.
* To some golfers, the greatest handicap is the ability to add correctly.
* In golf, some people tend to get confused with all the numbers…they shoot a “six”, yell “fore” and write “five”.
* Swing easy. Hit hard.
* Why is it twice as difficult to hit a ball over water than sand?
* Golf! You hit down to make the ball go up. You swing left and the ball goes right. The lowest score wins. And on top of that, the winner buys the drinks.
* Golf: A 5 mile walk punctuated with disappointments
* Fairway: An unfamiliar tract of closely mowed grass running from the tee to the green. Your ball is usually found immediately to the left or right of it
* Oxymoron: An easy par-3
* Practice Tee: A place where golfers go to convert a nasty hook into a wicked slice
* Mulligan: Invented by an Irishman who wanted to hit one more 20-yard grounder.
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The Smart Guide To Golf contains the material that you have needed, but were...