Every sport has its own lingo and golf is no different, however the difference between what you say and what you mean can sometimes be worlds apart:
“IT’S WINDY UP THERE”
What it means: A high breeze, undetectable at ground level, has changed the intended flight of my ball, which I struck perfectly.
Reality is…Sh**! Another snap-hook
“I NEDD TO BOOST MY SUGAR”
What it means: The front-nine was mentally draining so I’ll have a quick isotonic drink to replenish my energy levels for the remainder of the round .
Reality is…I’m going to the bar for a pint. To be honest, there’s a good chance I’ll be playing no more golf today and calling the wife for a lift in several hours.
“SORRY, I THOUGHT YOU WERE CLEAR OF THE GREEN”
What it means: I’ve committed golf greatest sin and played to a green occupied by the group in front, both dangerous and downright rude.
Reality is…Hurry up!
“SIT DOWN OR GET UP”
What it means: Travel the intended yardage I’ve indicated.
Reality is…Why am I after an inanimate object???
(source: GolfPunk International magazine, GP148)
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